Today I decided that when I die I want my headstone to have a built-in bottle opener. That way when my friends and family come to visit they can share a beer in my memory. The best part? My headstone will read:
Ryan Danger Sims
Have a drink on me!
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Monday, November 09, 2009
A brilliant idea
A man named Josh Silver has invented self-adjusting eyeglasses for use in underdeveloped countries. The glasses are cheap to produce and do not require a doctor or prescription.
A Zulu man wearing adaptive glasses.
"Silver has devised a pair of glasses which rely on the principle that the fatter a lens the more powerful it becomes. Inside the device's tough plastic lenses are two clear circular sacs filled with fluid, each of which is connected to a small syringe attached to either arm of the spectacles.
The wearer adjusts a dial on the syringe to add or reduce amount of fluid in the membrane, thus changing the power of the lens. When the wearer is happy with the strength of each lens the membrane is sealed by twisting a small screw, and the syringes removed. The principle is so simple, the team has discovered, that with very little guidance people are perfectly capable of creating glasses to their own prescription."
So far, over 30,000 pairs have been distributed around the world by various charitable organizations.
Source: The Daily Telegraph
A Zulu man wearing adaptive glasses.
"Silver has devised a pair of glasses which rely on the principle that the fatter a lens the more powerful it becomes. Inside the device's tough plastic lenses are two clear circular sacs filled with fluid, each of which is connected to a small syringe attached to either arm of the spectacles.
The wearer adjusts a dial on the syringe to add or reduce amount of fluid in the membrane, thus changing the power of the lens. When the wearer is happy with the strength of each lens the membrane is sealed by twisting a small screw, and the syringes removed. The principle is so simple, the team has discovered, that with very little guidance people are perfectly capable of creating glasses to their own prescription."
So far, over 30,000 pairs have been distributed around the world by various charitable organizations.
Source: The Daily Telegraph
Friday, October 16, 2009
Hobo attack!
BA man charged in reported harmonica attack
Tulsa World (article excerpt) - October 8, 2009
A Broken Arrow man is facing the music after being accused of beating his roommate on the head with a harmonica.
According to Decai Liu’s arrest report, his roommate was in the bathroom getting ready for work when Liu burst in and started beating him with the instrument.
Police tried to arrest Liu, but he allegedly resisted and head-butted one of the officers. They eventually subdued him with pepper spray, according to the report.
Liu’s roommate told police that “I don’t know what his problem was,” the report indicates.
Officers took the harmonica as evidence.
Tulsa World (article excerpt) - October 8, 2009
A Broken Arrow man is facing the music after being accused of beating his roommate on the head with a harmonica.
According to Decai Liu’s arrest report, his roommate was in the bathroom getting ready for work when Liu burst in and started beating him with the instrument.
Police tried to arrest Liu, but he allegedly resisted and head-butted one of the officers. They eventually subdued him with pepper spray, according to the report.
Liu’s roommate told police that “I don’t know what his problem was,” the report indicates.
Officers took the harmonica as evidence.
Friday, October 09, 2009
Zombie shirt
Check out this awesome t-shirt Capcom is selling to promote their upcoming Resident Evil game. Flip it over your head and voilà - instant zombie.
Thursday, October 08, 2009
Top 5 most played songs in my iTunes (+ least played)
1. "Float On" by Modest Mouse (166 times)
2. "The District Sleeps Alone Tonight" by The Postal Service (149 times)
3. "Sitting, Waiting, Wishing" by Jack Johnson (131 times)
4. "Brand New Colony" by The Postal Service (119 times)
5. "Flight Test" by The Flaming Lips (118 times)
Least Played: "Come Sail Away" by Styx (0 times)
Submit your own list as a comment! (If you don't know how to get play count information from iTunes email me and I'll walk you through it.)
2. "The District Sleeps Alone Tonight" by The Postal Service (149 times)
3. "Sitting, Waiting, Wishing" by Jack Johnson (131 times)
4. "Brand New Colony" by The Postal Service (119 times)
5. "Flight Test" by The Flaming Lips (118 times)
Least Played: "Come Sail Away" by Styx (0 times)
Submit your own list as a comment! (If you don't know how to get play count information from iTunes email me and I'll walk you through it.)
Saturday, October 03, 2009
Retraction
Ladies and gentlemen, it seems as though I have made a mistake. This is the first time that it has ever happened to me so bear with me while I get this out. Since I posted my opinion of Lady Gaga on this blog (see Guns for Gaga), I have come to realize something very disturbing. I actually like Lady Gaga. There, I said it.
Wow, I feel so much better, like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Before you judge me look within yourself. Have you ever been driving down the road when a Lady Gaga song came on the radio and found yourself turning it up and/or singing along? If you say "no" you are a liar and I take back calling you a lady and/or gentlemen at the introduction of this post.
I know that this is a shock and that some of my friends and even my own brothers will probably disown me once they read this post. How could I go from encouraging people to donate money to buy Lady Gaga a gun so she could blow her head off to rocking out to "Paparazzi" on my iPod in just a few short months? I don't know. I only know that it's true.
Wow, I feel so much better, like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Before you judge me look within yourself. Have you ever been driving down the road when a Lady Gaga song came on the radio and found yourself turning it up and/or singing along? If you say "no" you are a liar and I take back calling you a lady and/or gentlemen at the introduction of this post.
I know that this is a shock and that some of my friends and even my own brothers will probably disown me once they read this post. How could I go from encouraging people to donate money to buy Lady Gaga a gun so she could blow her head off to rocking out to "Paparazzi" on my iPod in just a few short months? I don't know. I only know that it's true.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Odd suggestions
Last week I came across an article on the "funniest suggestions from Google Suggest." For those that don't know, Google Suggest is the feature that gives you real-time suggestions for search queries as you type them. I posted my favorite examples below.
Source: The Daily Telegraph
Source: The Daily Telegraph
Monday, September 21, 2009
A list of my car accidents
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: Their fault
DESCRIPTION: I was broadsided in the middle of an intersection by a woman who ran a red light. Even though she admitted it was her fault at the time, she later changed her story and it was deemed my fault because I was 16 and it was her word against mine. The side of my car was smashed in pretty bad.
DAMAGE: Severe
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I peeled out at a stop sign and lost control of the vehicle. The car jumped the curb and I landed in a construction site (where the living room would have been if the house was completed).
DAMAGE: Mild
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I rear ended a guy outside of my high school Grad Night event. He was cool and didn't report it to his insurance.
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: Their fault
DESCRIPTION: I was driving in Tahoe and some crazy lady ran into the side of my car when I was trying to change lanes. She then got out of the car and screamed at me in the snow, saying she was going to call her husband so he could come down and "kick my ass." I told her to "bring it on" and she chickened out.
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: My fault (kind of)
DESCRIPTION: I was following my friend's sister's boyfriend in the days before cell phones and if I lost him I would have been completely lost in the snow. He was going 90 mph in a blizzard and I was racing to keep up. I hit a patch of snow on the road and spun my grandparent's van around about 270 degrees and ended up three feet away from falling off a cliff. The car wouldn't start and had to be towed. The upside? My brother and I got to stay in a hotel in Tahoe that night and party it up.
DAMAGE: Mild
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I somehow got myself stuck in a parking lot with high walls and couldn't get out without scraping the side of my car. Think "Austin Powers" only with a lot more cursing.
DAMAGE: Severe
FAULT: Jack Daniel's
DESCRIPTION: I ran over a hobo in an abandoned train yard. This may sound bad to some of you but the hobo came from out of nowhere and in my defense I was really, really drunk.
Okay so I made the last one up. Just making sure you were still paying attention. Moving on. . . .
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: My fault (kind of)
DESCRIPTION: I ran a stop sign in a parking lot outside of my dorm and got hit by some douche. I know it was my fault but this guy was going like 30 mph and wasn't paying attention to what he was doing. Also, since when are you supposed to obey stop signs in parking lots?
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I had just signed a lease on an apartment and I was excited. Too excited, apparently to notice the pole next to my parked car. I backed out quick at an angle and completely ruined the side of my car.
DAMAGE: Severe
FAULT: My fault (kind of)
DESCRIPTION: Somebody two cars in front of me decided to slam on their breaks to turn into a farmer's market for some impulse vegetable shopping. I slammed on my breaks but it was too late. I was driving my brother's truck and I completely smashed in the entire front of it. (Sorry bro!)
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I backed a rental car into an apartment call box. After fleeing the scene I realized that I had been seen, so I had to come back and face the music.
DAMAGE: Mild
FAULT: Their fault
DESCRIPTION: I was in one of those In-N-Out's that have two drive-thru windows. An employee needed to walk across the drive-thru lane to get some supplies and my car was blocking the door. I backed my car up for him and as I did the side-view mirror of my car caught on the drive-thru window and broke off. The guy was a total dick and immediately went on the defensive even though I didn't say anything to him. He panicked and said that he never asked me to back up and that he wasn't going to pay for the damage. I wasn't expecting anything like that but he could have at least apologized for the fact that my car got messed up and/or offered to give me a free fries or something. It's a good thing their burgers are so damn good or I would have never gone back.
FAULT: Their fault
DESCRIPTION: I was broadsided in the middle of an intersection by a woman who ran a red light. Even though she admitted it was her fault at the time, she later changed her story and it was deemed my fault because I was 16 and it was her word against mine. The side of my car was smashed in pretty bad.
DAMAGE: Severe
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I peeled out at a stop sign and lost control of the vehicle. The car jumped the curb and I landed in a construction site (where the living room would have been if the house was completed).
DAMAGE: Mild
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I rear ended a guy outside of my high school Grad Night event. He was cool and didn't report it to his insurance.
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: Their fault
DESCRIPTION: I was driving in Tahoe and some crazy lady ran into the side of my car when I was trying to change lanes. She then got out of the car and screamed at me in the snow, saying she was going to call her husband so he could come down and "kick my ass." I told her to "bring it on" and she chickened out.
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: My fault (kind of)
DESCRIPTION: I was following my friend's sister's boyfriend in the days before cell phones and if I lost him I would have been completely lost in the snow. He was going 90 mph in a blizzard and I was racing to keep up. I hit a patch of snow on the road and spun my grandparent's van around about 270 degrees and ended up three feet away from falling off a cliff. The car wouldn't start and had to be towed. The upside? My brother and I got to stay in a hotel in Tahoe that night and party it up.
DAMAGE: Mild
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I somehow got myself stuck in a parking lot with high walls and couldn't get out without scraping the side of my car. Think "Austin Powers" only with a lot more cursing.
DAMAGE: Severe
FAULT: Jack Daniel's
DESCRIPTION: I ran over a hobo in an abandoned train yard. This may sound bad to some of you but the hobo came from out of nowhere and in my defense I was really, really drunk.
Okay so I made the last one up. Just making sure you were still paying attention. Moving on. . . .
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: My fault (kind of)
DESCRIPTION: I ran a stop sign in a parking lot outside of my dorm and got hit by some douche. I know it was my fault but this guy was going like 30 mph and wasn't paying attention to what he was doing. Also, since when are you supposed to obey stop signs in parking lots?
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I had just signed a lease on an apartment and I was excited. Too excited, apparently to notice the pole next to my parked car. I backed out quick at an angle and completely ruined the side of my car.
DAMAGE: Severe
FAULT: My fault (kind of)
DESCRIPTION: Somebody two cars in front of me decided to slam on their breaks to turn into a farmer's market for some impulse vegetable shopping. I slammed on my breaks but it was too late. I was driving my brother's truck and I completely smashed in the entire front of it. (Sorry bro!)
DAMAGE: Moderate
FAULT: My fault
DESCRIPTION: I backed a rental car into an apartment call box. After fleeing the scene I realized that I had been seen, so I had to come back and face the music.
DAMAGE: Mild
FAULT: Their fault
DESCRIPTION: I was in one of those In-N-Out's that have two drive-thru windows. An employee needed to walk across the drive-thru lane to get some supplies and my car was blocking the door. I backed my car up for him and as I did the side-view mirror of my car caught on the drive-thru window and broke off. The guy was a total dick and immediately went on the defensive even though I didn't say anything to him. He panicked and said that he never asked me to back up and that he wasn't going to pay for the damage. I wasn't expecting anything like that but he could have at least apologized for the fact that my car got messed up and/or offered to give me a free fries or something. It's a good thing their burgers are so damn good or I would have never gone back.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Way to go, Killer!
SC teen bags 10-foot alligator with a crossbow
Associated Press - September 17, 2009
A 16-year-old girl has bagged a 10-foot alligator in a South Carolina swamp.
In the middle of the night. With a crossbow.
The State newspaper in Columbia reported that Cammie Colin won one of 1,000 lottery slots for the state's annual public alligator harvest. Hunters are required to use a crossbow or a harpoon.
Cammie was the only person in her group authorized to shoot the 353-pound gator. The Lexington resident was with a guide, her father, an uncle and her brother in an 18-foot boat early Sunday in the headwaters of Lake Marion.
They have 40 pounds of alligator steak in the freezer now.
Cammie says most of her teachers are using her new nickname, "Killer."
Associated Press - September 17, 2009
A 16-year-old girl has bagged a 10-foot alligator in a South Carolina swamp.
In the middle of the night. With a crossbow.
The State newspaper in Columbia reported that Cammie Colin won one of 1,000 lottery slots for the state's annual public alligator harvest. Hunters are required to use a crossbow or a harpoon.
Cammie was the only person in her group authorized to shoot the 353-pound gator. The Lexington resident was with a guide, her father, an uncle and her brother in an 18-foot boat early Sunday in the headwaters of Lake Marion.
They have 40 pounds of alligator steak in the freezer now.
Cammie says most of her teachers are using her new nickname, "Killer."
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Tuesday, September 08, 2009
The weirdest animals on Earth
The Daily Telegraph (a London paper) has published a list of "The weirdest animals on Planet Earth." Here are some of my favorites.
The long eared jerboa is a nocturnal mouse-like rodent found in the deserts of China and Mongolia. It has a long tail, long legs and extremely large ears. Being such a rare creature, it is in danger of extinction.
The blobfish is a gelatinous mass with a density slightly less than that of the water it occupies. This helps it maintain buoyancy. Hovering just above the sea-floor, the blobfish gobbles edible matter that floats past it.
The aye-aye shares a lot in common with the woodpecker - it taps trees to find grubs. When food is located it uses its rodent-like teeth to gnaw a hole, then digs them out with its long middle finger.
Leafy seadragons are covered with leaf-like appendages, making them remarkably camouflaged. Found in Australia, they inhabit calm, cold water and have been protected by the government since 1982.
The shoebill is a very large bird found in tropical swamps of eastern Africa. It stands at an average of four feet with a wingspan of over seven feet. The species was only discovered by ornithologists in the 19th century.
The most distinctive trait of the proboscis monkey is the male's large protruding nose. It has been suggested that the female proboscis monkey prefers big-nosed males.
The star-nosed mole's snout has 22 fleshy tentacles that are used to identify food by touch. Often found in North America, it lives in wet lowland areas and eats small invertebrates, aquatic insects, worms and molluscs.
The long eared jerboa is a nocturnal mouse-like rodent found in the deserts of China and Mongolia. It has a long tail, long legs and extremely large ears. Being such a rare creature, it is in danger of extinction.
The blobfish is a gelatinous mass with a density slightly less than that of the water it occupies. This helps it maintain buoyancy. Hovering just above the sea-floor, the blobfish gobbles edible matter that floats past it.
The aye-aye shares a lot in common with the woodpecker - it taps trees to find grubs. When food is located it uses its rodent-like teeth to gnaw a hole, then digs them out with its long middle finger.
Leafy seadragons are covered with leaf-like appendages, making them remarkably camouflaged. Found in Australia, they inhabit calm, cold water and have been protected by the government since 1982.
The shoebill is a very large bird found in tropical swamps of eastern Africa. It stands at an average of four feet with a wingspan of over seven feet. The species was only discovered by ornithologists in the 19th century.
The most distinctive trait of the proboscis monkey is the male's large protruding nose. It has been suggested that the female proboscis monkey prefers big-nosed males.
The star-nosed mole's snout has 22 fleshy tentacles that are used to identify food by touch. Often found in North America, it lives in wet lowland areas and eats small invertebrates, aquatic insects, worms and molluscs.
Friday, September 04, 2009
Thursday, September 03, 2009
A neat idea
"Putpockets" give a little extra cash
Reuters - August 19, 2009
Visitors to London always have to be on the look out for pickpockets, but now there's another, more positive phenomenon on the loose -- putpockets.
Aware that people are suffering in the economic crisis, 20 former pickpockets have turned over a new leaf and are now trawling London's tourist sites slipping money back into unsuspecting pockets.
Anything from 5 pounds ($8) to 20 pound notes is being surreptitiously deposited in unguarded pockets or open handbags in Trafalgar Square, Covent Garden and other busy spots.
The initiative, which runs until the end of August in London before being rolled out countrywide, is being funded by a broadbrand provider, which says it wants to brighten up people's lives in unusual ways.
"It feels good to give something back for a change -- and Britons certainly need it in the current economic climate," said Chris Fitch, a former pickpocket who now heads TalkTalk's putpocketing initiative.
"Every time I put money back in someone's pocket, I feel less guilty about the fact I spent many years taking it out."
London's police have been briefed about the plan, which will see at least 100,000 pounds given away.
Reuters - August 19, 2009
Visitors to London always have to be on the look out for pickpockets, but now there's another, more positive phenomenon on the loose -- putpockets.
Aware that people are suffering in the economic crisis, 20 former pickpockets have turned over a new leaf and are now trawling London's tourist sites slipping money back into unsuspecting pockets.
Anything from 5 pounds ($8) to 20 pound notes is being surreptitiously deposited in unguarded pockets or open handbags in Trafalgar Square, Covent Garden and other busy spots.
The initiative, which runs until the end of August in London before being rolled out countrywide, is being funded by a broadbrand provider, which says it wants to brighten up people's lives in unusual ways.
"It feels good to give something back for a change -- and Britons certainly need it in the current economic climate," said Chris Fitch, a former pickpocket who now heads TalkTalk's putpocketing initiative.
"Every time I put money back in someone's pocket, I feel less guilty about the fact I spent many years taking it out."
London's police have been briefed about the plan, which will see at least 100,000 pounds given away.
Monday, August 31, 2009
I'm a big dork
I just realized how much of a nerd I really am when I bought my new Monopoly video game. While purchasing the game the cashier asked me, "why don't you just get the board game?" To which I responded pathetically, "I have the board game version but no one will play it with me."
The truth is that Monopoly has always been my favorite game but it isn't the easiest thing to find people willing to spend 3-5 hours fighting over fake money. With the video game I can curse at the other players all I want and I don't have watch people try to scam each other with shady trades.
I wasn't sure about getting the video game version but it was calling my name - literally. Check out this detail from the back cover:
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Dutchess
This character was created by Pete Sims. Go make your own at marvel.com. If you email your superhero to me I'll post it on this blog!
Friday, August 28, 2009
Hobocide
This character was created by Jim Condon. Go make your own at marvel.com. If you email your superhero to me I'll post it on this blog!
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
El Tigre
This character was created by Jacob Sims. Go make your own at marvel.com. If you email your superhero to me I'll post it on this blog!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Flame
This character was created by Debbie Sims. Go make your own at marvel.com. If you email your superhero to me I'll post it on this blog!
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Big Baller
Have you always wanted to create your own comic book superhero but are held back by the fact that you can't draw to save your life? Well, today is your lucky day. Marvel has created a website that allows you to create a character by piecing together pre-drawn parts. After you finish you can download your image and/or email it to a friend.
Check out the bad-ass that I created:
Go create your own at marvel.com. If you email your superhero to me I'll post it on this blog!
Check out the bad-ass that I created:
Go create your own at marvel.com. If you email your superhero to me I'll post it on this blog!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)