Saturday, September 30, 2006

Outside the Actor's Studio

These 10 questions are asked at the end of every "Inside the Actor's Studio" show by host James Lipton. (Thanks go out to Debbie for giving me the idea to post this.) Please submit your own answers to these questions!

1. What is your favorite word?
2. What is your least favorite word?
Two words: "cool beans."
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Positive reinforcement and encouragement.
4. What turns you off?
When people are cruel to others less fortunate than themselves.
5. What is your favorite curse word?
6. What sound or noise do you love?
"May I take your order sir?"
7. What sound or noise do you hate?
Howard Stern.
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Food critic.
9. What profession would you not like to do?
Strawberry picking.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
"You did great down there! Now go make your grandpa an Old Fashioned. He says you make them better than me although I am pretty sure he is just being nice. I am God after all. . . ."

Friday, September 29, 2006

Hippie jokes!

Q: What's red and orange and looks good on a hippie?
A: Fire

Q: How do you know a hippie came to your party?
A: He's still there.

Q: Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie from drowning?
A: He was too far out!

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Three of my favorite things in one!

A video game of the original Star Wars trilogy played with Legos!

Wednesday, September 27, 2006


"And note that [dishwashing] is the most filthy and deadening and brutal work; that it is a cause of anemia, nervousness, ugliness, and ill-temper; of prostitution, suicide, and insanity; of drunken husbands and degenerate children. . . ."

Upton Sinclair

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Top 5 sodas (+ worst ever)

1. Coca-Cola Classic
2. Black Cherry Vanilla Coke
3. Dr. Pepper
4. Mountain Dew
5. Squirt

Worst: Grape Crush

Disagree? Submit your own list as a comment!

Monday, September 25, 2006

Bill Brasky

Bill Brasky is the name of a Saturday Night Live character. During the "Bill Brasky" sketches friends gather to drink Scotch, smoke cigarettes, and loudly reminisce about their mutual acquaintance, Bill Brasky. Here are some things they say about him:

"Bill Brasky is the father of every kid in this town!"

"His poop is considered currency in Argentina."

"Did I ever tell you about the time Brasky took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally Brasky takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' We sat there for a year and a half; until sure enough, someone constructs a bar around us. Well, the day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Brasky yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found 'em!'"

"He hated Mexicans! And he was half-Mexican! And he hated irony!"

"The story of Johnny Appleseed is based on Brasky. Except for the part about planting apple trees . . . and not raping men."

"He did all the makeup on the Planet of the Apes movies."

"He drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls."

"I remember one time, Brasky took his family to SeaWorld. They were watching Shamu the whale and Brasky got splashed. So Brasky yells, 'I'm Bill Brasky and no one gets me wet!' So he climbs into the tank, grabs Shamu and throws the whale into the audience, splashes him and yells, 'Now how do you like it?' And then damn if Brasky didn't step in there and finish the show."

"We once had a bachelor party for Brasky. He ate the entire cake before we could tell him there was a stripper in it."

"Brasky's family crest is a picture of a barracuda eating Neil Armstrong."

"Brasky named the group Sha Na Na. They did not want to be called that."

"If you drop a phonograph needle on Brasky's nipple, it plays the Beach Boys' Pet Sounds."

"Did I ever tell you about the time he taught his son how to drive? He did it by entering him in the Indy 500. The kid wrecked and died. Brasky said it would've happened sometime."

"He breastfeeds John Madden!"

"He slept with all of our wives, punched us in the face, and we loved him for it."

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Double Old Fashioned (Ryan's recipe)

3 oz Kentucky straight bourbon whiskey
4-5 brisk shakes of Angostura bitters
2 maraschino cherries
1/2 slice orange
1/4 tsp. sugar (half a sugar packet)
1/4 tsp. water (a tiny splash)

1. Put cherries, orange slice, sugar and water into highball glass. Allow some maraschino juice to drip (4-5 drops) into glass.
2. Press orange slice and cherries with stirring utensil to let out juice and muddle liquid together.
3. Add ice cubes, bourbon and bitters.
4. Stir and enjoy.

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Top 5 arcade games (+ worst ever)

1. Super Street Fighter II Turbo
2. Point Blank
3. Daytona USA
4. Time Crisis 3
5. Road Blasters

Worst: Centipede

Disagree? Submit your own list as a comment!

Friday, September 22, 2006

Top 5 Mexican beers (+ worst ever)

1. Bohemia
2. Dos Equis (Special Lager)
3. Pacifico
4. Corona
5. Modelo (Especial)

Worst: Negra Modelo

Disagree? Submit your own list as a comment!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Top 5 candies (+ worst ever)

1. Skittles (original flavor)
2. See’s Toffee-ettes (similar to Almond Roca but better)
3. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups (original flavor)
4. Junior Mints (with popcorn if possible)
5. Pop Rocks (just because they are so cool)

Worst: Black liquorish flavored Jelly Beans

Disagree? Submit your own list as a comment!

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

It's all about me

Isn't it exciting?! I have my own blog and I feel so cosmopolitan.