Check out this awesome cake I saw on Martha Stewart today. No, I usually don't watch Martha Stewart but I was flipping around and had to stop and check this out so cut me some slack, okay?
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
I've been doing it all wrong!
The above plaque is posted in every men's restroom in Disneyland. Thanks "Sparkle," I don't know what I would have done without you!
Went to Disneyland recently and had a fantastic time. While I was there I asked a couple of questions that I've always been curious about. Here are the answers I got from some random park workers I surveyed:
• The costumes that the employees wear remain the property of Disneyland and are never sold to the workers. Employees can take them home to launder them (Disneyland will also dry-clean them free of charge) but the costumes must ultimately be returned to the park.
• The jokes that the tour guides tell on the Jungle Cruise attraction are scripted and the guides are never allowed to ever go off the cuff. The employees are given a script with about 20 jokes per area of the cruise and they can choose which ones to tell (which explains why you hear different jokes depending on which boat you get on).
Monday, April 12, 2010
Jung Yeezy*
Artist Yeondoo Jung has an awesome name. He also transforms children's drawings into photographs. Here are some of my favorites from his exhibition entitled "Wonderland."
*The title is a play on the name of "Young Jeezy" the rapper (also known as "Lil J"). At least these used to be his names before he grew up and changed his name to just "Jeezy." Jeezy is just his stage name of course, his real name is Jay Jenkins (which has no bearing whatsoever on this explanation but I thought I would throw in that extra bit of trivia). You see what I did with the title of this post was change his first name from Yeondoo to "Yeezy." I then moved his last name to the front since "Jung" is pronounced like the English word "young."
I realize that many people reading this post haven't even heard heard of Young Jeezy in the first place so my fabulous word play won't even register. I also will admit that I really don't know anything about Jeezy or his music (I had to look him up on Wikipedia just to get the spelling of his name right).
So wasn't that great? Jokes are always the best when you follow them up with a nice long explanation. I am just trying to be "hip" to fit in with the kids here people!
*The title is a play on the name of "Young Jeezy" the rapper (also known as "Lil J"). At least these used to be his names before he grew up and changed his name to just "Jeezy." Jeezy is just his stage name of course, his real name is Jay Jenkins (which has no bearing whatsoever on this explanation but I thought I would throw in that extra bit of trivia). You see what I did with the title of this post was change his first name from Yeondoo to "Yeezy." I then moved his last name to the front since "Jung" is pronounced like the English word "young."
I realize that many people reading this post haven't even heard heard of Young Jeezy in the first place so my fabulous word play won't even register. I also will admit that I really don't know anything about Jeezy or his music (I had to look him up on Wikipedia just to get the spelling of his name right).
So wasn't that great? Jokes are always the best when you follow them up with a nice long explanation. I am just trying to be "hip" to fit in with the kids here people!
Friday, April 09, 2010
U.S. Americans need more maps!
This page used to feature a video of a Miss Teen USA pageant contestant giving a disastrous answer to a question posed by the host. I recently learned that the girl contemplated suicide after the clip went viral, which is not at all funny.
If you’re thinking about suicide, or are worried about a friend or loved one click here or call 1-800-273-8255.
If you’re thinking about suicide, or are worried about a friend or loved one click here or call 1-800-273-8255.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Windfall
Mad dash as truck spills 100,000 dollars onto US street
AFP - March 25, 2010
People fell onto a bag of cash like a pack of hungry piranhas after more than 100,000 dollars tumbled out the back of an armored truck onto an Ohio street, local media reported.
The bag split open after it fell off the back of the vehicle Wednesday and the driver drove away without noticing.
But a whole bunch of people spotted the cash blowing down the street in Whitehall, a Columbus suburb, and a mad dash for cash ensued.
"People were jumping out of their vehicles," one witness told NBC4 news.
"Like when you throw some fish in and you've got a school of piranhas and they haven't eaten for a long time. It was funny."
Another witness described a surreal atmosphere with people laughing, smiling and taking as much as they could carry.
Workers at a nearby flower shop helped police gather up the money in boxes. Several people ended up bringing some of the cash into the police station.
But only about 10,500 dollars had been recovered by the end of the day, the Columbus Dispatch reported.
"We're hoping that more people do the right thing," Whitehall Police Sergeant Randy Snider told the paper.
Police are examining surveillance camera video and photographs from cell phone cameras to try to track down the people who grabbed the money.
AFP - March 25, 2010
People fell onto a bag of cash like a pack of hungry piranhas after more than 100,000 dollars tumbled out the back of an armored truck onto an Ohio street, local media reported.
The bag split open after it fell off the back of the vehicle Wednesday and the driver drove away without noticing.
But a whole bunch of people spotted the cash blowing down the street in Whitehall, a Columbus suburb, and a mad dash for cash ensued.
"People were jumping out of their vehicles," one witness told NBC4 news.
"Like when you throw some fish in and you've got a school of piranhas and they haven't eaten for a long time. It was funny."
Another witness described a surreal atmosphere with people laughing, smiling and taking as much as they could carry.
Workers at a nearby flower shop helped police gather up the money in boxes. Several people ended up bringing some of the cash into the police station.
But only about 10,500 dollars had been recovered by the end of the day, the Columbus Dispatch reported.
"We're hoping that more people do the right thing," Whitehall Police Sergeant Randy Snider told the paper.
Police are examining surveillance camera video and photographs from cell phone cameras to try to track down the people who grabbed the money.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
My video game collection (2010)
It's time once again for me to show off my (updated) video game collection. Anyone looking for a recommendation should know that I only keep games that I love (which means I think all of these games are awesome).
Click on the image to view a larger version
I also have the following games downloaded on my Xbox, Wii, and DSi:
Trials HD (+ Big Pack), Shadow Complex, Turtles in Time RS, Marvel vs. Capcom 2, Peggle (+ Peggle Nights), Portal: Still Alive, Ms. Pac-Man, Frogger, Super Mario Bros., Super Mario World, Contra III: The Alien Wars, Street Fighter II: The World Warrior, Street Fighter II Turbo: Hyper Fighting, SimCity, Vegas Stakes, Zombies Ate My Neighbors, Super Mario Kart, Mario Kart 64, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, Art Style: Pictobits, Bejeweled Twist, Downtown Texas Hold'em, Sudoku (EA version), Touch Solitaire, Puzzle League Express, Dr. Mario Express, Pinball Pulse: The Ancients Beckon, Bookworm, Asphalt 4: Elite Racing, and The Oregon Trail
Click on the image to view a larger version
I also have the following games downloaded on my Xbox, Wii, and DSi:
Trials HD (+ Big Pack), Shadow Complex, Turtles in Time RS, Marvel vs. Capcom 2, Peggle (+ Peggle Nights), Portal: Still Alive, Ms. Pac-Man, Frogger, Super Mario Bros., Super Mario World, Contra III: The Alien Wars, Street Fighter II: The World Warrior, Street Fighter II Turbo: Hyper Fighting, SimCity, Vegas Stakes, Zombies Ate My Neighbors, Super Mario Kart, Mario Kart 64, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, Art Style: Pictobits, Bejeweled Twist, Downtown Texas Hold'em, Sudoku (EA version), Touch Solitaire, Puzzle League Express, Dr. Mario Express, Pinball Pulse: The Ancients Beckon, Bookworm, Asphalt 4: Elite Racing, and The Oregon Trail
Thursday, February 25, 2010
And I thought the In-N-Out trailers were cool
Subway now has a sandwich shop atop a crane that will rise alongside the Freedom Tower during construction (the Freedom Tower is the building being put up to replace the World Trade Center in NYC). The Subway will be fully operational and serving construction workers throughout the building process and its final stop will be at the 105th floor. It is equipped with a bathroom and everything. What a crazy place to work!
Friday, February 19, 2010
Kristen Wiig thinks I'm a caveman
So I met Kristen Wiig on Wednesday night. Everything started off pretty good - I talked with her about her awesome shark t-shirt and she seemed like a nice person. My wife and I wanted a photo with Kristen so I busted out my 35mm disposable camera (which I had from a snowboarding trip last week) and commented on how "old school" I am for using outdated technology. After posing for the picture (seen below) our friend Julie asked me to take a photo of her with Kristen. The problem is that I didn't know how her damn phone/camera hybrid worked and I came off looking like a freaking Neanderthal.
While trying to take a photo I held the camera backwards and, ignoring the cries from Kristen to turn it around, I promptly took a picture of my own face. Dazed by the flash that had just seared my eye sockets from less than an inch away, I turned the phone over and tried again. Of course, at this point the flash needed to recharge so I had one of those awkward moments where I held the camera, promising the two that the photo would be snapped any second while they waited for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually Kristen asked "did you take it yet?" to which I stammered, "uh, I don't know, I think so." I guess I shouldn't feel that bad. It's not like I majored in art/photography in college. . . .
While trying to take a photo I held the camera backwards and, ignoring the cries from Kristen to turn it around, I promptly took a picture of my own face. Dazed by the flash that had just seared my eye sockets from less than an inch away, I turned the phone over and tried again. Of course, at this point the flash needed to recharge so I had one of those awkward moments where I held the camera, promising the two that the photo would be snapped any second while they waited for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually Kristen asked "did you take it yet?" to which I stammered, "uh, I don't know, I think so." I guess I shouldn't feel that bad. It's not like I majored in art/photography in college. . . .
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
A case of the Mondays
The following is a quote taken from an actual Associated Press news article published last Monday.
"Authorities said a man accused of stealing a car then reporting it stolen remains in custody after telling police he was robbed at gunpoint while trying to buy crack cocaine with a credit card."
"Authorities said a man accused of stealing a car then reporting it stolen remains in custody after telling police he was robbed at gunpoint while trying to buy crack cocaine with a credit card."
Monday, February 08, 2010
I know he can get the job but can he do the job?*
Reader's Digest recently published a list of blunders that people made during actual job interviews. They are fantastic.
Balding applicant abruptly excused himself and returned a few minutes later wearing a hairpiece.
Applicant asked to see the reviewer's résumé to see if the personnel executive was qualified to interview him.
Applicant phoned his therapist during the interview for advice on answering specific questions.
During the interview, an alarm clock went off in the applicant's briefcase. He apologized and said he had to leave for another interview.
Applicant challenged the interviewer to arm-wrestle.
*Bonus points if you can guess the movie quoted in the title of this post!
Balding applicant abruptly excused himself and returned a few minutes later wearing a hairpiece.
Applicant asked to see the reviewer's résumé to see if the personnel executive was qualified to interview him.
Applicant phoned his therapist during the interview for advice on answering specific questions.
During the interview, an alarm clock went off in the applicant's briefcase. He apologized and said he had to leave for another interview.
Applicant challenged the interviewer to arm-wrestle.
*Bonus points if you can guess the movie quoted in the title of this post!
Friday, February 05, 2010
Number 4 out of 19,355!
Monday, February 01, 2010
Oh hell yeah!
Some of you may have noticed that I added a new link entitled "The Big Picture" to my blog. The site is a kind of illustrated news service where you can learn about world events through photographs.
I was browsing the site last week and found a piece on "Fiery European Festivals." These festivals are the most awesome and manly spectacles I have ever set my eyes on. One event involves dudes riding through fire on the backs of horses and the other (entitled "Up Helly Ah") culminates with "up to 1,000 'guizers' (men in costume) throwing flaming torches into a Viking longship." Oh hell yeah!
Click on either image to see the article.
Looks like the Sims brothers need to book a trip to Europe.
I was browsing the site last week and found a piece on "Fiery European Festivals." These festivals are the most awesome and manly spectacles I have ever set my eyes on. One event involves dudes riding through fire on the backs of horses and the other (entitled "Up Helly Ah") culminates with "up to 1,000 'guizers' (men in costume) throwing flaming torches into a Viking longship." Oh hell yeah!
Click on either image to see the article.
Looks like the Sims brothers need to book a trip to Europe.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
High drama
Click the following link to hear a dramatic reading of a real breakup letter. Make sure to turn up the volume on your computer!
http://youmakemetouchyourhandsforstupidreasons.ytmnd.com/
http://youmakemetouchyourhandsforstupidreasons.ytmnd.com/
Friday, January 29, 2010
The Invisible Man
My brother Aaron recently showed me the work of Chinese artist Liu Bolin. He paints his body to blend into the scenery behind him. These pictures are real (no Photoshop)!
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Thoughts to think about
My brother-in-law David sent me a forward the other day that he said reminded him of my blog. It was a long list of "random thoughts from people our age." Usually I don't post anything from email forwards but there were a few "thoughts" that made the cut. Here are my favorites:
1. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
4. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
5. Was learning cursive really necessary?
6. Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart," all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart."
7. MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.
9. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
1. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
4. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
5. Was learning cursive really necessary?
6. Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart," all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart."
7. MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.
9. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Camping on Hoth
Check out this Tauntaun sleeping bag à la The Empire Strikes Back. It even has a lightsaber zipper!
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Another brilliant idea
Today I decided that when I die I want my headstone to have a built-in bottle opener. That way when my friends and family come to visit they can share a beer in my memory. The best part? My headstone will read:
Ryan Danger Sims
Have a drink on me!
Ryan Danger Sims
Have a drink on me!
Monday, November 09, 2009
A brilliant idea
A man named Josh Silver has invented self-adjusting eyeglasses for use in underdeveloped countries. The glasses are cheap to produce and do not require a doctor or prescription.
A Zulu man wearing adaptive glasses.
"Silver has devised a pair of glasses which rely on the principle that the fatter a lens the more powerful it becomes. Inside the device's tough plastic lenses are two clear circular sacs filled with fluid, each of which is connected to a small syringe attached to either arm of the spectacles.
The wearer adjusts a dial on the syringe to add or reduce amount of fluid in the membrane, thus changing the power of the lens. When the wearer is happy with the strength of each lens the membrane is sealed by twisting a small screw, and the syringes removed. The principle is so simple, the team has discovered, that with very little guidance people are perfectly capable of creating glasses to their own prescription."
So far, over 30,000 pairs have been distributed around the world by various charitable organizations.
Source: The Daily Telegraph
A Zulu man wearing adaptive glasses.
"Silver has devised a pair of glasses which rely on the principle that the fatter a lens the more powerful it becomes. Inside the device's tough plastic lenses are two clear circular sacs filled with fluid, each of which is connected to a small syringe attached to either arm of the spectacles.
The wearer adjusts a dial on the syringe to add or reduce amount of fluid in the membrane, thus changing the power of the lens. When the wearer is happy with the strength of each lens the membrane is sealed by twisting a small screw, and the syringes removed. The principle is so simple, the team has discovered, that with very little guidance people are perfectly capable of creating glasses to their own prescription."
So far, over 30,000 pairs have been distributed around the world by various charitable organizations.
Source: The Daily Telegraph
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